So Let's Talk About Radiation

Radiation

It started this past Monday, the 5th of August. Day 1 took about 20 minutes because they did scans at the beginning so they would know exactly where to zap me with radiation. Day one was pretty miserable. That mask squished the living day lights out of me. 

I should back up - a week before that they made the actual mask. I got into a gown and laid on the hardest, most narrow table and they put a wet, pliable, mesh mask on me and snapped it down. They did scans during this time and about 10-15 min later, the scans were done and the mask was almost completely hardened, but definitely enough to take off of me. It was SUCH a fun experience. Not. 

****** I started this post right after radiation and then the photos got stuck on my phone, so I am just finishing it now. ******

This is after my first radiation treatment - the one that took 20 minutes. My jaw hurt so bad!! And my shoulders/neck... all from being strapped down super tight! And I had these lovely "scales" or "dots" or "waffles" (depending on who you ask) for 30-60 minutes. I got these marks every time. But the first time they were the worst, since the treatment was the longest. Radiation reptile... Waffle face... :) 

This is the bottom of my chin after the first treatment. It was SO tight that it actually bruised my chin. They ended up only snapped 4-5 of the "snaps" and leaving 4-5 undone. I was still strapped down tighter than I probably should have been (tighter than they intend it to be). 

I was sitting outside with the girls while they were playing and M came up and asked me what was on my chin. I was totally confused and didn't (obviously) know it was there until then. The physical bruise faded for the most part, but the underside of my chin stayed a little bit puffy.

Each treatment took about ten minutes, maybe not even that long. You get to listen to any Pandora station. I chose Phillip Phillips. It plays music that kind of chills me out, so it helped me not freak out about being strapped down. :) And we probably all remember my "Home"... obsession? Yes, possibly an obsession. :)



So here's the radiation machine and me strapped down. They even put a big, fat rubber band around your feet so you don't have to worry about keeping them still. They mark the mask and line you up so that you are EXACTLY where you need to be before starting. Sometimes they had to pull my hips to the left, but I think I got pretty good at playing myself where I needed to be. :) Holding the blue ring also helps you not have to worry about your hands/arms.

Here's a side view of the mask. Lovely huh? Looks comfy, yeah?



View from the top. They cut the nose hole out because it was SOOOOO tight that I couldn't breathe. I had to keep my eyes close because the mask was so tight - I could mostly open my right eye haha, but I need the nose hole. :)



You can see how they mark the mask so that they zap you in the right place every time. I have a slight sunburn inside that area.





I had 16 radiation treatments. I met with the doctor every Wednesday. Between week 2 and 3 I lost 3 pounds and they kind of freaked out on me. At the beginning of radiation, they told me not to lose any weight and to have lean protein with my three main meals each day (so my body could/can repair itself faster). My throat started to get sore after the first week. Now it's so painful that it hurts to swallow anything. I've been living on Cepacol cough drops because I REALLY struggle with liquid meds. I have the "miracle mouthwash" that has the lidocaine in it and stuff, but I just can't do it. I also have liquid Lortab, but the pharmacist said that would give me a "hangover" feeling the next morning. I have to wake up at 6, so that doesn't work. They also gave me a prescription for liquid oxycodone, but I haven't filled it because I have to go to a specific pharmacy and I just haven't had the chance. I need to, though. When I lost weight, I told them that was like the weight of me eating lunch or not having eaten lunch yet. haha. They didn't think it was so funny. :) I welcome weight-loss, since I gained so much, of course, but they don't. :) In a couple weeks, they'd give me the 100% go-ahead. The sore throat will last another 10-14 days and I think it will take that whole time because I use my "loud voice" at school to teach. My throat hurts SO bad when I get home. Man, I miss bread. (Bread and meat hurt the worst so far.)

And that brings us to today!! I had my last treatment today!! Yay!!!! They even gave me a bottle of sparkling cider and a Certificate of Excellence for doing a good job completing radiation, haha. :) I need to take a picture of those. I put the certificate on my fridge. :) Maybe I'll frame that sucker, haha.

They let you take your mask home. I have named it/him Radiation Ralph. It's in the car right now. I left it there so that it would freak Patrick out when he got in the car to go to work. That worked. :) And he took it to work to freak other people out. haha. :) I'm planning to shoot it. I might paper-mache it for Halloween and THEN shoot it, but ultimately, I want to shoot it. :)

And so... I guess I am officially in remission! Weird! And so great! I have A LOT of feelings about it all and it's just one more surreal part of the whole journey. I've had more anxiety recently, so we are working on that, but I'm just kind of excited, relieved, nervous, anxious, confused/not sure how to feel about everything. But I don't have to go back to the doctor until November!! :) 

I fought like a girl and I won! And in five years, I can say I'm a cancer survivor and I REALLY did win! :) Cheers!!